I’m delighted to say that the article on NVC parenting I helped a journalist from The Times write last year has just appeared in print under the title: ‘All we are saying is: give peace a chance’. The online version features my friend and colleague Sarah Ludford, and Helen Bone, who has been attending my parenting workshops in Bristol.
Here’s a quote from the article:
Helen Bone runs a group in Bristol that meets every two months to work through the practicalities of parenting with nonviolence. She turned to NVC when her son Sam’s behaviour began to deteriorate, triggered by his asthma.
“He couldn’t verbalise how his asthma made him feel so he shut me out, with lots of kicking and shouting,” she says. “My response — angry, frustrated and upset — was making the problem worse. Through NVC we’ve learnt a different way of communicating and it’s gentler.”
So how does it work? Bone describes a time when she used NVC with her son to prevent a conflict getting worse. “We were at a relative’s house and Sam was playing in the sandpit with a toy lorry, but the rest of the family were going to the park,” she says. “He just lost it because he didn’t want to stop what he was doing. I used to think, ‘I’m the parent, so he’s going to do what I say’, but instead I thought about what his needs were. I realised he just wanted some autonomy. I think that’s important, and what tantrums are about in most cases.”
I’m delighted with what I interpret as Heidi’s straightforward enthusiasm for NVC, and presenting stories from Helen, Sarah and her own life that demonstrate its effectiveness.
Love and life, Shantigarbha